Ok, so you chose it! Awesome! Now comes the rest of it: the actualization and institution of all the parts and pieces to make the change a reality.
Starting anything that is affecting a lot more futures than you can articulate or get a cognitive sense of has a lot of awareness that goes with it: It's important to give yourself space. More than you think is reasonable or that you need.
A lot more things will come up than you had expected. The overwhelm you are feeling is mostly awareness of all the things in front of you.
ASK YOURSELF: Am I aware of more than I'm acknowledging here? What's required of me and what would it take to have more ease?
I already use the ClickUp to organize my team and my business, so the fact that I ended up using it to organize the mess in my head re: the move isn't a huge shock.
You use whatever works for you.
What you've got to get is: If you don't find a way to get clarity on the 'everything' that requires your attention, you'll leave yourself in a foggy state of overwhelm, and that ain't fun for anyone.
So create whatever OCD system YOU need to clarify the things.
ASK YOURSELF: Is there a system I could use to support me with this choice? Is there anything I need to change? Start? Stop?
Here's the weird thing: just after you create that system, don't be afraid to abandon it in favor of simpler choices. I did start with something super detailed: a detailed item-by-item list on ClickUp, but as I got more of a sense of the requirement of every item, I realized that I needed an easier way.
Sometimes you might think you are starting a system for one thing and then it turns out to be that something else is required.
So after you've created your OCD version of the overview that will give you clarity, don't be afraid to let all of that go again. None of this is set in stone. If you make anything a system or a structure, it can't change. Let every choice be malleable.
A plan is only good for 10 seconds. Use whatever system that works for you and will give you more insight into what has to be done next. Set dates, make choices, and always stay present to what is going on in the moment. What's required now?
With every situation or choice: Look at it and ask: What will my life be like in 5 years if I choose this? What choice will have the most movement and the most ease?
Gary Douglas (the founder of Access Consciousness) talks about the universe being a configurator of possibilities. We choose, and the universe contributes the most elegant way for everything to show up, in ways we cannot predict or imagine.
KEY POINT: Don't make yourself wrong for any of the choices you do make, because you needed whatever awareness that came from that choice. Choice creates awareness and opens the door to other choices. You actually gain access to more choices after making the ones that get turned around. Get that you needed that information and move on.
Apparently, moving is number 2 on the list of the most stressful life events (or something like that!) I had no idea and definitely didn't include care for my body like I could have.
Big changes can be ease, and they can be intense for your body because you're handling MUCH more than you even know. There are so many pieces to this puzzle that are below the surface or involve a lot more than is cognitive.
So take care for your body as much as possible.
Here's the weird thing about big choices: you are actualizing a LOT of futures. And, if you don't acknowledge what you are creating, affecting, and changing on a moment-by-moment basis, you could feel more f*cked up than you've ever felt in your life.
Seriously.
When you pause to acknowledge what is, the process gets easier.
Ask this: Am I allowing myself to be aware of everything that is actually occurring?
Include your awareness of the future by asking yourself and getting a sense of what's truly occurring.
Realize you are in a big change. You will likely not be able to handle your daily life in the same way that you could before the change. Your workload has just increased by a factor of 100 and so has your awareness of everything that's changing.
Allow yourself to have more space.
What can you let go of?
What can you add?
Can you add babysitters?
Housekeepers?
Moving services?
Access Bars® & bodywork?
Come up with as many things as you can choose (including wildly taking advantage of friends and family) and choose it.
Give yourself more space to handle everything that you need to handle right now. The more you can do things from relaxation, the better and easier everything will be.
Your processes are different. Let them be different. You are two individuals going through a joint experience. They will be dealing with a whole different set of things.
Talk about what is going on for you, if you can. But most importantly, add more allowance, not less.
Allowance is different than acceptance and it's where everything is just an interesting point of view. You are the rock in the stream, if you are allowance, and nothing sweeps you away.
They are having their own set of awareness and going through different changes: give both of you the space to have your own process.
I'm not even kidding.
This is an intense time.
Have a drink. Use float tanks. Go on walks. Have sex. Get massages. Eat and drink Incredible food & cocktails. Have single malts. Everything you can choose to nurture you, have it.
ASK: What will contribute to more ease and relaxation?
This choice has changed you. You are different now. Nothing will function the same way it did before this choice, and if you keep going back to try and find reference points for the way things were, you'll make yourself crazy.
Let the space you're in be new. You're new. This is new. What's possible now?
TRY THIS TOOL. Say: I destroy and uncreate all my projections, expectations, separations, judgments, and rejections of myself, my partner, my relationship, the choice, and whatever else there is.
Then do the Access Consciousness Clearing Statement: Right and wrong, good and bad, all 9, poc and pod, shorts boys and beyonds.
Every day you are a new person. Every day you can ask:
Who am I today and what needs my attention?
This is a trick I use to 'not forget things'.
In truth, the important stuff will continue banging on your head energetically. But you can also trust you: if you know that if you don't write it down, it won't occur - schedule it! And then check into your schedule daily to see if what you scheduled is truly required.
The trick here, again, is not to use your schedule as a Bible you have to stick to but as a 'pinging tool'. Meaning, you put it there because in this moment you're sure it needs to be there. And when you get there, you look at it and see if it's required or if something else is.
Start with the things that you know have to be done by a deadline and work backwards for what needs to be handled.
In our case, we were navigating pre-steps to obtaining our residency in Panama while liquidating our residency in Canada. There were many many things we needed to not miss in leaving one country and entering another.
So, again with the calendar: put not-missable deadlines in there and work backwards in time for what needs to occur to accomplish those things.
This is definitely the third time I've said this, but I don't think I can say it enough:
Add to your life to have more ease during this big change!
Add (new) friends, porters, concierges, valets, business class, nice hotels: the more ease you're willing to have, the more ease you'll have.
Recognize that there are lots of people to support you. Again, you are handling a lot of things!
Would you be willing to have more ease? Who or what can you add to your life to have it?
I have made MANY big life changes on a shoestring budget. You CAN do it.
However, regardless of the amount of money you have or don't have: don't make money the determining factor.
Here's how you do that. For every choice you have in front of you, ask yourself: if money wasn't the issue, what would I choose?
See what choices expose themselves as what you would truly choose! And then you can say, Universe, I'll have that. What would it take for the money to show up?
Every choice you make creates a different future. The ones you're making now will be the future you have tomorrow.
What choices do you have today to move your life forward in dynamic ways?
Just get that when making these choices, everything can seem and be more intense than usual. Hopefully these tips will make it easier!
Take care of you. Be kind. To you.
You're a gift to everything that's possible.
Gary Douglas, the founder of Access Consciousness® gave us one clearing to use 30 times a day for 30 days, and it's changing lives!! I've called it The Awareness Challenge, and ll you have to do to try it out is jump in.
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